Are you ready for this?

I was trying to look back and figure out the last time I did a good wordy update so I could figure out what I've shared and what I haven't. I went a good ways back (like... May) and still didn't really find anything, so you're in for a treat! ;)

I think it's pretty obvious that I'm still trying to figure out how to manage life now that we have two little ones. I have not yet figured out why it looks so easy for everyone else. :P I will admit that things are getting significantly easier with each passing month. James more or less eats what we eat (no more breastfeeding and pumping, no more preparing separate soft baby foods). His schedule is a lot more flexible. He's happy to play on his own or with his brother (unless I'm cooking dinner). We can travel (or even go out to dinner) without having to pack a Mary-Poppins-style carpet bag with everything, including the kitchen sink. But many days I'm still overwhelmed by just how much work it takes to keep up with it all (or attempt to, anyway).

Actually, I think I've decided we would all be much happier people if we just gave up eating. I'm only half kidding. Setting foot in the kitchen seems to automatically cause riots in the house. And sometimes it feels like the entire day is spent cooking, eating, and cleaning up after our three (simple!) meals, and most of the time the kids don't eat much of what I make anyway. Luckily (or unluckily?) they more or less refuse fast food just the same so trying to make things easier on myself (guilt trip or not) doesn't help much.

Just keeping it real here.

It's certainly not all bad, and I really am not as hard on myself as it may seem here. I'm not ashamed to share that I've been seeing a counselor, and she has really helped me to learn to cut myself some slack and see just how much I do, and should be proud of (and I am!). It's actually kind of funny because any time I hear my perfectionist voice telling me I should do this, or fix that, I hear my counselor's voice asking me if it's really necessary. Example: we ordered Drew a train shelf for Christmas. It arrived broken. I had wanted to paint it, but we were out of town until Christmas Eve, and just getting it fixed was troublesome enough, let alone getting it painted. I was so disappointed because I had envisioned him opening this beautiful blue train shelf, but then I heard my counselor's voice asking me, "is he going to notice if it's not painted? No! In fact, he'll probably be happy to help you paint it!" and just like that I let it go. And surely enough, Drew didn't notice that it wasn't painted. ;)

How it arrived

How I wanted it to look

Some updates on each of us (and I'm going to try to include a few pictures, most already posted to FB, but for family that doesn't do Facebook, I thought I'd put some here, too):

Drew: He loves school, his brother's hair, trains, talking (and talking and talking and talking and....), music, and peanut butter and jelly. I'm pretty sure he has a wider vocabulary than I do. He's now starting to learn some Spanish thanks to a set of DVDs I bought with Christmas money from "Grandma Betty". He begs me to put them on every day. I was worried he wouldn't like them because he wouldn't understand (they are completely in Spanish), but I was very happily wrong. He understands and is learning, and it makes my heart so very happy (of course a Spanish teacher would say that!). Why, you might ask, aren't you teaching him Spanish yourself? Well, first, as mentioned above, I am trying to cut myself some slack and not pile things on my plate. But mainly, the best way for a child to learn a language in the home is through immersion, or hearing that language all the time. Children who grow up in a bilingual home (mom speaks one language, dad speaks another) are truly blessed as it is the BEST way to learn multiple languages. Solely speaking a language that is not your native language with your child, however, has proven to be more harmful than beneficial as it causes communication barriers. Spanish is not my native language. I've always enjoyed teaching him words and reading him Spanish books, but beyond that, there hasn't been a whole lot of Spanish in the house. The DVDs now give me an opportunity to introduce and speak more Spanish with him, and he seems to enjoy the challenge of trying to communicate in another language for a short period each day.

Typing to Auntie Laura

Dentist!

Him and a friend (who's a girl) kissing :-/

Meeting Santa

Loving on his brother

My little angel (school Christmas performance)

Loving on his brother again

Christmas dinner with cousin Kalli

Gingerbread house on Christmas Eve

James: He loves his blankie, dancing, cheesing for the camera, getting into things he isn't supposed to, and pomegranate. He is allergic to eggs and sesame, and we unfortunately suspect wheat. He was diagnosed with the egg and sesame allergies in May, but we recently had him tested for wheat, and though the allergist said the numbers we "low" and eating wheat shouldn't cause any problems, every time we give him products with wheat (bread, tortilla, pizza, pasta) he gets congested and sneezy and will not sleep. We like sleep so we choose not to give him wheat. Perhaps it's another ingredient that goes along with those products, but for now avoiding wheat altogether has helped. It is making meal planning more difficult, but we're learning a lot in the process, and thanks to the gluten-free fad, life is a lot easier than it could be. The allergist is fairly optimistic that he'll outgrow his allergies. Otherwise he's walking around like a happy little boy. He says only a few words (mama, dada, Drew, uh oh), but I guess his brother does most of the talking for him. He knows a few "baby signs" as well, but for the most part gets his ways with grunts and smiles.

Cheering on the Wisconsin Badgers

Eating up every last bite of Thanksgiving dinner

Poor baby does not like being bundled!

In Drew's Alpaca sweater from Peru

Christmas morning

Cutie!

Me: I am working part-time and loving it. I love having a bit of both worlds: getting to get up (okay, not exactly the getting up part), get showered and dressed, and be a professional, while also getting more time at home with my boys, and more time to work on taking care of myself. Admittedly, I don't feel like I've fully recovered since my "exacerbation" that led to IV antibiotics in the spring so I am trying to really focus on my health which means exercising, eating well, doing meds, and getting sleep. I rarely, if ever, manage all 4 in one day, but as I said, I'm trying to let go of my perfectionism and be all right with that. :) Each bit counts. As hard as I try to cut myself some slack, I still manage to pile things on my plate, like craft and cooking projects. I am thankful to have time to do things that I love like that, though.

Volunteering at Drew's school

Nativity Advent calendar I made

Took this wreath from last year apart to glue the
ornaments together then put it all back together

Almost 3 gallons of smoothies

Me and my boys

Visiting my sister in SF in October
We're "sister planets"! Venus and Earth!

Jason: He's working from home now and, though he's "on the schedule", hasn't worked at the golf course since... well... we can't even remember (May?). I love not having to care what time the sun sets! We enjoy having him around more, but working from home isn't as glamorous as one tends to envision. I think he feels a little trapped in the house. Perhaps some day we can upgrade to a house with an actual office; for now he's converted a section of our bedroom, which obviously has its own drawbacks as well. He tries to go to the gym and get out with friends to help. But we sure do love having him around!

If you actually made it this far, congrats!