Long time no write

My posting here has become less and less frequent over the years, and in this most recent break (one of the longest I think this blog has seen) I've pondered whether I want to continue the blog or if it's maybe time to say goodbye. Most of the time when I think about writing now, instead of being excited or thinking through the words I want to put down (as I used to do), I feel a pang of guilt and push the rest of my thoughts aside.  But this space has always been a comfort to me. Even if the words I write go unread, the process of putting my thoughts to "page" has often been therapeutic.

I think two things have contributed to my lethargic/apathetic attitude towards my blog. First, when I began this blog one of the main purposes was to share updates with my family and friends that are spread far apart. At the time I began the blog (in 2009!!) Facebook wasn't as popular as it is now, at least not with generations other than my own, and not as many of my family and friends were on it. Now that they are, I find myself sharing a lot of the fun photos and small updates there that I used to share here. It's quick and easy and you get to be "liked". Who can argue with that?

Second, my laptop had been slowly dying making the process of writing and uploading pictures incredibly slow and painful. With limited time as it was, I just didn't have the patience to wait on the computer.

But it really didn't take much pondering to decide that I'm really not ready to say goodbye to my blog. And I just recently got a new computer so I'm hoping that will help me to write more frequently. But, even if it doesn't, it's just nice to have this outlet for writing the occasional update, venting a frustration, or sharing something interesting. 

All of that said, I think we're due for an update...

 

I left off my last update hoping that the coming winter would not be a long and harsh one. As we're finally on the other side of it now, I can say that my predictions that it would be a bitterly cold winter were not too far off. We got some snow, but overall I didn't feel like it was a lot. The problem (for me anyway) was the cold cold COLD temperatures! It was so hard to go out and do anything with the boys because of all the necessary layers and the time it took to get bundled. I also didn't expect it to get dark so early! I mean, yeah, that happens in Georgia too, but it didn't occur to me that more northern latitudes would get dark even earlier. The sun was setting usually around 4:30. That's crazy!! As can be imagined, none of us were big fans of feeling cooped up AND in the dark. We welcomed spring with open arms, and I can say that I think it was one of the most beautiful springs I have experienced in my life. I don't doubt that a large part of that was simply the juxtaposition of the two seasons, something you don't experience to the same extent in Georgia.

Spring has brought lots of outdoor play time on the trampoline in the backyard, or with the neighbors in the front yard. The boys really enjoy playing with the neighbors' boys across the street, and I just can't get over how much I enjoy that. We really didn't have a lot of kids the same ages as our boys in our previous neighborhood, and it makes me so happy that the boys have that here. I remember so many happy hours playing outside with neighbors growing up and it's something I've always wanted for my children.
 



Star gazing with friends



Drew is a few short months away from starting kindergarten. He is super excited! As any mom facing it for the first time, I have mixed feelings of excitement and sadness, but I think overall we're looking forward to it. I think Drew is ready for the challenge. We had applied for him to go to the dual language program (Spanish immersion) our local school offers, but unfortunately there is only one class so entry is lottery-based and he got waitlisted. I'm still waiting and hoping, but, after freaking out initially, I've calmed myself by trusting God's plan. What's meant to be will be. Between Spanish DVDs, Spanish classes we've been taking, and my own Spanish abilities, I don't doubt he'll learn some Spanish anyway. And, on top of that, I became fluent in Spanish even though I didn't begin learning it until 7th grade. So it's not the end of the world if he doesn't learn it now (though I really wanted him to have that native-like fluency I feel I lack...).
 






Kindergarten Orientation

Since my last post, Drew has progressed even more in the reading department. He's reading full books now and only seems to get caught up on fairly difficult words. At risk of sounding like I'm bragging, he's really shocked me with some of the things he's reading. He read the word "island" the other day (which isn't even the most shocking of words he's read... try "wainscot" from a Beatrix Potter book. :P Not that he, or I, knew what it meant :P), but that stood out to me because I vividly remember a student in my class when I was in 1st grade reading the word island as "iss-land" but Drew didn't even hesitate in reading it correctly. My mom and dad constantly give me looks when he reads words that are much too big for a 4-year-old to be reading and all I can do is shrug. I don't know if it makes me sound more or less bragging to say I really didn't teach him that. For reasons that are kind of complicated to explain, I actually didn't really want him to read until kindergarten. Not that I discouraged reading, but I definitely didn't sit down and work on phonics with him. But he's definitely reading. I posted on Facebook last night that TWO HOURS after I'd put him to bed, I found him reading in his room. His biggest concern? "How could you tell my lights were on??" Sigh... I completely understand how difficult it is to put down a good book, but I didn't expect to begin this battle so early.

 

It seems words are just the name of his game. He likes to do crossword puzzles with me and occasionally guesses an answer based on a clue or letters provided and he has taken to figuring out how to say words backwards in his head (like "milk" is "klim"). But for as much as he's into words, he seems to struggle the same amount with many physical tasks. Even using a fork seems to be quite difficult for him. And he's still struggling with writing and pencil grasp. He definitely gets the concept of spelling but pencil to paper is still very difficult. Despite a lot of effort on my part, he continues to hold his pencil in a full fist. And as if I wasn't worried about it enough already, at kindergarten orientation they told us to "make sure your child has a mature pencil grasp by the time they enter kindergarten". I've tried everything I can think of (and everything everyone else on the internet has thought of) to build hand strength and to get him comfortable with the correct pencil grasp, but at this point it's become a battle of wills and I've decided it's a battle better left for professionals. He's more interested in coloring, drawing, and writing now than he was even a few months ago, so at least we've made progress there. And he did shock me by writing a number of sentences inside a fortune teller at my mom's house. My mom said he sat down for a half hour and did it all by himself (using the death grip, of course, but hey... it's legible). I'll take it!


If you can't tell, he's still obsessed with superheroes
And his "fortunes" are more like "commands"



In case you weren't sure what I meant by "fortune teller"

Because I can see that this is already getting quite long, I will save the rest for (a) future post(s). But don't worry, I'm already writing them as you read...

 

Wordless Wednesday: First day of "school"

Snow Day!

Believe it or not, Atlanta is getting more snow! Our area reportedly got 9 inches last night! Looked more like 6 to me, but 6 is a lot more than I've seen *here in a while. We of course had to take Drew out in it. He's seen more snow this winter than I ever expected!

At this point there was actually a hard ice layer on top of the snow

Drew was rather indifferent to the snow, but our animals were not fans...





I was off work today and will be again tomorrow, with the possibility of being off once again on Wednesday as temperatures aren't supposed to warm up enough for anything to melt. And I know you Canadians will probably scoff at the ridiculousness of school being closed 2 or more days just for a few inches of snow, but remember that Atlanta just isn't equipped with proper snow plows and salting trucks in order to make the roads safe. The sun is our best and most reliable way of de-icing the streets (and it looks like we won't be seeing much of that until this weekend! Temps continue to remain below freezing all week!).

I am cherishing every little bit of extra time I get to spend with Drew. I made it through my first week back to work better than I thought I would, but I'm still more than ecstatic that I get to have a few more days at home with him. The job is going well. The staff has been very friendly and welcoming. The job is fun and rewarding. And I'm fairly easily able to take the breaks I need to in order to pump. I'm really enjoying meeting all these children from other countries and getting to spend a few moments getting to know them. The staff I work with is just as international as the kids, which is fun. I have to admit that I find it strange that the fact that I've lived in Canada, Singapore, and Costa Rica is simply met with "oh, that's nice, anywhere else?" ;) The only thing I don't like about the new job (besides the fact that I have to be there :P) is the hours- I work 8 to 4. I'd rather have earlier hours so I could have more evening time with Drew, and it would also help to avoid the horrid I-85 traffic. But, as that's just about my only complaint, I've been sending up a lot of thankful prayers because I think I'm in just about the best place I could be right now.

Stay warm everyone!

Back to the grindstone

2010 was a spectacular year, and now that it has come and gone and I'm staring 2011 in the face, I have to admit I am not all that excited. Because now I have to truly face what I have been dreading for the last 6 months- returning to work. The paperwork has been filled out, the calls have been made, and everything is set for my return on Monday. Yes, THIS coming Monday.

I am NOT ready for this. I am trying so hard to be excited about the prospect of doing something new- my new position will be an ESOL Screener at the International Center. That means I will be testing incoming international students to see if they need English for Speakers of Other Languages classes. I think working at the International Center will not only be fun and different, but I really feel like it's a great fit for my skills and background.

But... as much as I keep telling myself I'm looking forward to this, I really am just dreading it.  Not because I don't want to work, but because I'm not ready to leave my baby. I keep pushing thoughts to the back of my head so that I can keep moving forward and keep getting the stuff done that I need to get done. But as each day passes and I get closer to Monday I have to pause a little longer and longer to remind convince myself that everything will be okay and to stop the tears from welling up in my eyes. And as I get closer and closer to Monday more of those tears are slipping out. I am spending more and more time just sitting and watching Drew and sneaking in snuggles when he'll let me.

I know there are lots of working moms out there. And I remind myself of this frequently. But when I sit down and do the math and realize I will only have 3-4 waking hours with Drew a day, I wonder how other moms do it. Because Drew is the reason I wake up in the morning. His waking smiles brighten my day, and I won't even get to see them anymore except on weekends. And he's changing so much, so fast! Just check out these photos...

First solids... I like rice cereal!

Standing! Sorry it's blurry... Mommy was a little nervous.

If I could choose not to go back to work I would in an instant. But first, and foremost, I'm under contract and if I break my contract I risk having my teaching license suspended or revoked. Second, we get health insurance through my job (and good health insurance at that since I work for the state). And third, we simply can't afford for me to be a stay-at-home mom right now.

Sigh.... it's going to take a lot of strength to get through the first day, then the first week, then the first month and so on until I make it to summer and decide from there what we will do next year. I know Drew will be in good hands, they just won't be mine, and that makes me very, very sad.

Hittin' the gym

Drew and I signed up for a free Gymboree class this week (you can too by going to the link!). Gymboree is a children's learning and play center. They offer developmental classes based on your child's age, and they also offer sports, music, and art classes (for the somewhat older children). We went to a "Play and Learn" class for ages 0-6 months.

Oh. My. Goodness... I had a blast! It was amazing just how interested Drew was in all of the activities. He generally doesn't seem to care much when I sing and do little hand games, but they taught us all sorts of neat tricks and fun things to do to get him not only to pay attention, but to encourage development of different areas, like vision, hearing, or hand-eye coordination.

Drew actually enjoyed tummy time too, for once! They put an unbreakable mirror on the floor and spun colorful balls all over the place. He was so interested in his reflection, the balls, and all of the other babies that he didn't seem to notice he was on his tummy (though he did roll over once onto the baby next to him when I wasn't paying attention- oops! I apologized several times for the both of us... well, for me really...)

We got to go play on some of the equipment too. Drew had fun rolling around on a huge ball (I didn't get pictures of that, sad!), rolling in a tunnel, and doing sit ups on a wobbly bridge.

(He actually did "sit ups" just about anywhere I put him- the teacher kept laughing at him getting his "work out" in.)

He also enjoyed bubble time, and had bubbles blown especially for him since it was his first class!

Oh man, if we had the money (and I thought I could handle the jealousy of Jason getting to take him while I work) I would totally sign him up for the classes! I am so glad I remembered to do this before I go back to work though. His smiles and awe were priceless!

(On a side note, because I know my family will be curious, I am likely returning to work in January. My doctor's orders were 6 months for recovery, which ends on December 29th. School is back in session January 3rd. I am no longer at the high school I was moved to as the Family Medical Leave Act only protects my position for 60 days. So that position was posted and filled, and, once again, I am kind of in the air as to where I'll be. So, if you're the praying type, keep us in mind and pray that whatever comes my way will be the best option for our little family.)

Glass throwing

After I graduated from UGA in 2006 I got a job, like you're supposed to do, teaching in Anderson, South Carolina. I had many interviews and almost just as many job offers (though a few did slip through my fingers) but ended up chosing the position I did because I would be teaching in a small town (hopefully easier, right?) and, most importantly, I could live at my parent's lake house for a fairly decent price (okay, and pretty d@$n good price). And who can argue that living on a lake wouldn't be a blast?

Well, that year ended up being what I deem one of the worst of my life. I was a new teacher nearly drowning in lesson plans, grading, tests, failing children, and home phone calls to be made. I hated it. I didn't have any idea what I was doing so I had to work hard to plan quality lessons. The time spent doing that meant that the piles of homework and tests to be graded mounted. And in the meantime I had to deal with the hormonal youth that, though they may have meant me no personal harm, sent me home in tears 4 out of 5 days of the week. And the phone calls... if you know me, you know I DESPISE the phone (and I do not use that term lightly), but we were required to inform parents of failing and nearly failing students. Making calls informing parents that their students aren't doing well is not a fun call to make, especially when you hate phones.

You would think that living at the lake would have offered pretty good opportunities to escape from my "torture", but unfortunately I didn't partake in the beautiful outdoors nearly enough. Instead I always seemed to tell myself I could enjoy it when I was "caught up" and trapped myself indoors wallowing in my piles of papers.

Even though we lived nearly 30 minutes from what I regarded as "civilization" (a fact that I grudged), Jason and I found a few things that we enjoyed and that made life a little more bearable including a little downtown cafe that made awesome calzones and another dinky roadside restaurant called Dad's 2 where we ate every Thursday night and where I always enjoyed a plate of potato skins (just about the only vegetarian option) and a liquorless margarita (it was made with a wine cooler because the sale of liquor was forbidden in the county... yet another fact I grudged.)

But there was one thing that I absolutely loved and was one of the few highlights of my life at that point, and that was taking the trash to the dump.

Yup, you read it right. Taking the trash to the dump. It actually wasn't the trash part that I enjoyed, it was the recycling.

You see, they had these large green dumpsters for the recycling, kind of like this one...

You drove up a hill and these dumpsters were actually below you. You stood on a concrete walkway and threw your recycling down into the appropriate dumpster.

The reason I enjoyed it so much was because of the glass. When you threw in your jars and bottles they would SMASH into tiny pieces. It was such an amazing feeling, like you were throwing your stresses and worries away and letting them blast into smithereens. And it was made even better for me knowing a) I was helping the environment by recycling (and not making a mess destroying things elsewhere) and b) because I got to organize while doing it because you had to separate the different colors of glass!! (Yeah, it's ok, I am a little obsessive compulsive).

My best friend Stacey is now in her first year of teaching and we have actually been saving up glass for over a month now with the sole purpose of going up to Hartwell to smash it. We went this weekend to do just that but unfortunately we did not time our trip well and the dump had already closed when we arrived and didn't open again until after we had to leave today. We will definitely be making a return visit soon for some recycling therapy.

We did take advantage of the beautiful weekend though and did a little jog taking in the fall foliage and the views of the lake. Daddy and Drew enjoyed some scenery too...

Drew also enjoyed a crackling fire with Aunt Stacey...

And some Waffle House!

Re: My Son is Gay

A shocking title, I know (especially since I have a 4 month old baby!). It is actually the title of this this blog post that I came across while doing some random browsing (as I often do while sitting and doing my medicine). I really think you should read it. And no, it is not actually about the fact that her son is gay, just as this post is not about the fact that my son is gay.

I'm pretty sure this little boy rocked Daphne much better than I did on Halloween!

 

I'm about to get preachy, and I'm sorry, but the article got to me. Before I even begin I am not going to try to claim that I am free from gender stereotyping. I'm just as guilty as anyone. Yesterday's post is proof of that. But it does really bother me that little girls can wear blue, green, brown...any color of the rainbow (that is not intended to be a pun), but my boy can't wear pink, and hardly even purple. It bothers me that a girl can dress up as a football player or a transformer and we say "you go girl!" but a boy can't even put a dab of paint on a single nail without shocked expressions. It bothers me that we get all up in arms over "freedom" because a city tries to ban restaurants from giving toys away with unhealthy meals but yet we're stomping those very rights to freedom of speech and expression in our own children's lives.

Drew is wearing pink AND purple in this rainbowy tie dye onesie! (He is also looking VERY tiny!!)

But what bothers me more than anything is that these parents are the bullies that we keep screaming we need to rid our schools of. School bullying leading to children committing suicide has been all over the news recently. In fact one of the first stories came out of the very county I teach in. But what can we do to stop the problem when the problem isn't even the children themselves? It absolutely hurts my heart to imagine this little boy with his creative costume idea (dressing up as Scooby Doo characters with a friend? That sounds like a blast!) standing nervously at the doors of his school worrying what the kids will say, only to be greeted by what the moms have to say. I understand that the moms were "looking out" for the boy and worrying over how he would be teased, but in doing so they became the bullies themselves. I can only imagine that this boy will never even so much as touch anything pink, purple, or sparkly ever again.

I think as adults we need to be more careful about the stereotypes we perpetuate with something as simple as a look on our face and the fact that those simple actions tell our children that it's okay to judge. Like I said above, I cannot claim to be free from guilt at all. This article really brought to my attention the problem we've created though and as a parent and a teacher I am making a promise to myself to be more conscious of my actions. Drew will learn from what I do, not what I say, and while I'm not going to start dressing him in pink and bows, I won't blink an eye if he wants to play with a Barbie doll instead of a GI Joe.

Just Trust

Nope, not "patience and trust", now it's just "trust".  It's official... I am going to be a high school Spanish teacher next year.  I accepted the job with the high school instead of the middle school.  I had another post planned for today (it's officially D-day! Look at my "tickers"!), so you may see another post from me later on, but I thought I'd go ahead and update you all on the job status since I took a lot of space on here to vent about it.

I already told you how the interview at the middle school went, but I haven't said anything about the high school.

The interview at the high school went... well... they seemed very supportive of teachers (the principal said he's not proud of his high suspension rate, but it works well for them because he won't stand to have one student interrupt instruction for even 5 minutes).  I would be teaching only Spanish 1, so I would only have one "prep" to prepare for... and overall they seemed much more organized and professional.

After that interview I immediately got a call from the principal offering me the job (when I say immediately I mean Jason was driving out of the parking lot and I was checking my phone to find that I already had a message from him!  I'm a slow walker these days, so it took me a minute to get to the car, but wow!).  I wasn't sure what to do right away... I knew that I didn't want to work at the middle school, but...

I was waiting... waiting to see if I heard from any other schools... hoping that maybe I'd hear something from my school.... I wanted to talk to a lawyer about my options.... and I just wasn't ready to accept a position at a high school.

But then I checked my school e-mail and I had two unread messages.  One from the principal of the middle school apologizing for having lost my phone number (!) and welcoming me to her school.  The second from HR entitled "Priority Reassignment" to several people, including my current principal, stating my new assignment to the middle school and asking people to make the necessary adjustments.  I freaked out!

It suddenly became obvious that if I did have a choice, the high school was it.  I knew immediately after walking out of the middle school that I did not want to work there, but I hadn't been ready to accept becoming a high school teacher again.... but now it might be too late to have any say in the matter!

I jumped on the phone to HR, but couldn't get a hold of anyone.... until today!  I called all day Tuesday and all day yesterday.  Finally this morning I got through....

And now I am officially a high school teacher.

The sudden fear of being placed at the middle school made the choice obvious.  After I got off the phone with HR I was momentarily relieved... "phew, I won't be stuck at that horrible school!"  But it only took seconds before the tears started flowing... "I'm a high school teacher"... I still have horrible nightmares about teaching high school- I don't know if I'm ready for this.

But I'm trusting that this is where I was meant to be.  I prayed to God to make the right choice obvious to me, and that it was.  So I'm trusting the high school is right place, and I'm trusting that He will help me through the year.  I'm relieved that the waiting game is over. I'm happy that I was able to play a part in the decision making. I'm not happy that these were my choices, and I still feel angry about getting reassigned, but I know it will work out.

Vent

So I'm going to be completely grouchy and negative in the post, so if you don't want to read it, you don't have to.  But I need to vent and let out some of these feelings that are frustrating me.

I have mentioned before that I found out shortly before the end of the school year that I was being "reassigned" (displaced, moved, relocated.... whatever your word preference is, it's all the same thing).  I mentioned how very much I love the school I'm at, and love what I do.  There was some hope that possibly things would work out- that I'd end up being able to stay... but....

I got a call Thursday afternoon last week from a middle school principal in my county- asking if I was interested in teaching middle school (honestly, I'm not, read on...).  We chatted for a few minutes and agreed to do an interview.  The next morning I got a call from a high school principal, also wanting me to come in for an interview.  At this point I assume this means that I'm not staying at my school (the hope was that there would be no other opening for me and the county would be stuck "reassigning" me right back to my school).  I'm also pretty sure it means I will definitely not be teaching elementary school (the Language Coordinator I also mentioned before told me in our meetings that there are 5 other elementary Spanish teachers being displaced and no other openings in elementary schools).

First off, I have to say- I don't know what's worse.  Doing an interview while on summer vacation, when I already have a job with the county, and while 9 and a half months pregnant, or having to go to an interview for which I had to prepare a "5-10 minute lesson plan presentation" for a job I don't even want.

Why don't I want the job?  Some history: I graduated in 2006 with a degree in Foreign Language Education and certification to teach K-12.  My student teaching had been spent teaching high school Spanish so I naturally accepted a job teaching high school.  It was one of the most miserable years of my life, and I don't say that lightly, especially as I generally don't like to be a negative person.  Jason will tell you it was one of his worst years too simply because I was so miserable (and he did a lot of work for me!).  I hated it.  I hated just about everything about it.  I hated battling with kids to get them to do simple assignments, I hated the feeling of knowing they were constantly trying to get away with things behind my back, I hated the stacks and stacks of papers to grade, I hated writing tests then grading them and feeling like a failure as I gave Cs, Ds, and Fs, I hated calling parents to let them know their child was failing, and parents saying "yeah, we know, we don't care...." (and should have continued on "so he's just going to sit there and be a pain in your a** for the rest of the year"), I hated the lack of support from other teachers and especially from the administration.... I asked and asked and asked for help, and never got it. I even began seeing a counselor to help me through.  So after only a year I threw in the towel and started searching for something else.  I happily found my current job teaching Spanish in elementary school.

I look back at the experience and know that I did a lot of growing that year.  I learned a lot about myself.  I learned a lot about teaching.  And I think, even though I hated it as much as I did, I truly am better because of the experience.  I think most of all it really made me appreciate having found my "niche" teaching elementary school.

So the prospect of going back to teaching high school is not a happy one for me.  Nor is the idea of teaching middle school, though I was, and still am, keeping an open mind (though read on for more on this...).  Before you say anything about "but you've grown, and it would be different at a different school, and now that you have more experience you'd do better" I don't want to hear it.  I know.... I would probably do better. I feel more prepared for it.  At the very least I could survive the year....

BUT I don't want to (can I stomp my feet and start throwing a temper tantrum now?).  I am so happy doing what I'm doing right now it just seems so unfair to make me move from something I love doing to something I can simply "survive".  And yes, maybe I would come to love it, but I simply don't want to do this right now.  I don't want to spend my measly 6 weeks of "maternity leave" (which isn't even maternity leave, it's just summer vacation) trying to create lesson plans for a whole new level of students and learn the new curriculum.  I don't want to spend what little time I have off with my newborn child worrying about what the new year might bring.  I don't want to spend the first year of his life stressed with lesson planning, grading, writing tests, etc. (all of which I've been happily able to avoid the last few years).

I think what has me most upset is the timing.  I could have handled this last year... unwillingly then too, but it was different.  Now I'm thinking in terms of how much time and energy I'm going to be able to give to my son and how unfair it is that I will adjusting to life as a mom at the same time as life as a middle school or high school teacher.  I hate to say it, but it really just sucks.

Have I mentioned that I already don't want to go back to work?  I can't even imagine how much that feeling is going to be multiplied in August (even going back to where I want to be!).  I'd love to be able to stay at home to raise my children, and that is eventually our plan, but that currently is not an option financially.  Jason already has 2 jobs!

So the interview at the middle school?  I would be teaching 6 different levels of students- a 9 week "intro" course to 6th graders (that's 1), 7th graders (that's 2), and 8th graders (that's 3).  I'd also be teaching a "Spanish for native speakers" course (that's 4), a year-long course for 8th graders (that's 5) and a 2 year-long course for 7th then 8th graders (that's 6).  6 classes to plan for, 6 classes to keep track of... oh, and my planning period each day? I would have a duty at the school... so no, no planning time.  At least teaching high school they try not to give you more than 2 or 3 "preps" (classes that require different "lesson plans").  6?? Okay, so I teach 6 now (K, 1, 2, 3, 4, and 5), but they are easy to adapt from grade to grade, and I only see each class once a week, not every other day!  On top of that the school was in worse condition than the one I'm already at (and that's saying quite a bit), the assistant principals were discussing going out and getting drunk last weekend (so professional), and oh yeah- I'd probably get to help with all the translating and interpreting for the school (considering it's 75% Hispanic). Sigh............. I'm keeping an open mind but was overall unimpressed. So much for having energy (or time!!!) for Floodling when I get home!

I have the interview at the high school tomorrow.  I can't believe that I am hoping it goes better than this one.  My initial thoughts were that middle school would at least be better than high school, but I am starting to change my mind.

I am still trusting that God has a plan for me, and that it will work out.  Patience and trust, patience and trust, patience and trust..... the hormones flying around are making it a little hard right now though.

She's gonna blow!

I'm a ticking time bomb... that's how I feel people view me these days at least.

Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday of this past week I agreed to work on mapping/designing/cleaning up the new Elementary Foreign Language curriculum with a group of other elementary language teachers and the county World Language coordinator.  I had initially planned on simply enjoying my summer after my last day Monday (as you know I've been looking forward to the time off!) but with things the way they are I figured it wouldn't hurt to "suck up" a little to the Language coordinator (unfortunately she has no control over the reassignments, but I still figured some brownie points wouldn't hurt).

Well, apparently the Language coordinator seemed to think I looked about ready to burst.  She kept telling me I was making her nervous even though I wasn't doing anything.  But if I moved, went to the bathroom, or coughed she would worriedly exclaim "are you all right??". At one point I had turned in my chair to prop my legs up on another chair (to help prevent my feet from swelling so much from all the sitting) and she said "you're not delivering, are you!?"  On the last day of our meeting she showed up with a sticky note... apparently the number for the security guy of the building "just in case!".  (If it's not obvious she has no children of her own and didn't realize that even if I were to go into labor I would likely have several hours before anything got serious).  She did tell me I was a "trooper" though and that is more or less what I was after (for her to see that I was so dedicated that I would come even on the verge of "popping").

Yesterday I was at Publix picking up some diapers and wipes (they were having a sale and I had some great coupons!).  I made my purchases, returned to my car, stuck the keys in the engine and turned...... and absolutely nothing happened.  Not even a noise.  I tried several times before I officially decided my battery was dead (and no, I had not left lights on, my battery just died- Jason told me later that when he got my oil changed last week they told him the battery needed to be replaced).  A guy happened to wander over and started checking out the battery while I explained I was calling my husband to see if he could come help.  I sat in the driver's seat to make the call and a Publix employee walked up and said "what!? Is she having the baby!?"  Haha!  I had to laugh....

It seems that these days instead of getting comments along the lines of "aww.... how far along are you?" I now get eyed and told "you look about ready to pop!" or "how can your husband make you grocery shop when you're about to burst!?".  People seem almost scared of me now as if having a baby means I'm literally going to "burst" and they may get maimed in the explosion.  I have to admit that I myself worry that my water may break when I'm out and about but the likelihood of that happening is very slim (most women's water doesn't break until far into labor, not as a sign that labor is beginning as on TV and in the movies). Maybe I just need to carry around flashing lights and an alarm that makes a big "awooga!" sound and see how people react then!

I can only imagine what people at the gym think when they see me climbing the stairs up to the treadmills.... RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!!

Sunny days, sweeping the clouds away!

So after several complaining posts (my bad day yesterday, the rude lady at Kohl's, and my no-fun news at school) I figured it's about time to talk about the good things going on right now!

1. As bittersweet as it is, school's out!  I have to return Monday for post-planning but am completely finished after that.  I am looking forward to having lots of free time to finally finish up the nursery and get other things ready for baby's arrival. I'm also happy that I will have plenty of time to just rest and get some good sleep before the arrival because I know things will be very different once he's here!  I'll at least have a little while where I can return to thinking 4:30 is actually night time, not morning.
2. I have my third (yes, I said third) baby shower tomorrow.  I had my friends and family shower in late April, then my work shower (which I completely forgot to post about!) early in May and now the ladies at my church are throwing me a shower.  I am so thankful to have so many amazing people in my life, and so excited that so many of them will be an amazing part of Floodling's life too!
3. Minus this minor cold I've come down with, I'm still feeling pretty great!  Heck, I walked 3 miles last weekend!  
4. And even with still feeling pretty miserable from this cold I slept through the night pretty well last night.  I am so thankful for my ability to sleep!
5. I am still really enjoying the feelings of Floodling moving around.  It never seems to get old.  Lately I've been able to feel his little elbows sticking out on my right side as he presses his butt out on my left.  It's fun to poke back at him.  I think he gets hiccups sometimes too and I enjoy lightly rocking my belly until they go away.
6. I got another piece of awesome, necessary furniture from our friend Jessica (and her daughter Lilly!).  Thanks for the dresser! She is the one who gave us our crib.  She has also offered up anything else we need (as have another set of friends), so if we don't get some of the last baby-gear items from our registry we can use some of their stuff.  
7. I finally have a car seat!  I can't believe it took this long to get one.. I just kept putting it off, but with people telling me baby might be here in a week and a half I started freaking out and decided I needed to get it NOW!  Thanks to the gift cards from my work shower I was able to get the car seat.  Now we just have to install the base....
8. And last but not least, I am so excited that Floodling's arrival is getting closer and closer! We're down to 4 weeks now!  Here's what he looks like and might be up to these days at 36 weeks:
   
   
   
   
   

   Your baby is still packing on the pounds — at the rate of about an ounce a day. He now weighs almost 6 pounds (like a crenshaw melon) and is more than 18 1/2 inches long. He's shedding most of the downy covering of hair that covered his body as well as the vernix caseosa, the waxy substance that covered and protected his skin during her nine-month amniotic bath. Your baby swallows both of these substances, along with other secretions, resulting in a blackish mixture, called meconium, that will form the contents of his first bowel movement.
   
   At the end of this week, your baby will be considered full-term. (Full-term is 37 to 42 weeks; babies born before 37 weeks are pre-term and those born after 42 are post-term.) Most likely he's in a head-down position. But if he isn't, your practitioner may suggest scheduling an "external cephalic version," which is a fancy way of saying she'll try to coax your baby into a head-down position by manipulating him from the outside of your belly.

9.  Okay, so that gives me one more thing to be glad about-  that he's in the right position already!

Hello pregnancy, where have you been?

So it seems like all at once all the pregnancy complaints I have yet to complain about came crashing down on me today.  I attribute it to a mix of things really more pregnancy-unrelated, but today was the first time I really felt like a pregnant woman and wondered if I can handle this...

It started yesterday really when I came down with a cold.... or finally succumbed to Spring allergies... or got a sinus infections... or whatever it is.  My throat was burning so bad and I had so much mucus I could hardly breathe or swallow.  The most miserable thing was not being able to take anything to make me feel better!  Jason was at work so I couldn't even get ginger ale which is my "mental medicine" when I get head colds.

I hardly slept last night... I've actually slept really well throughout the pregnancy only waking up once or twice to use the bathroom then going right back to sleep.  Last night I woke up almost every hour nearly choking.  I would cough and hack, drink some water, go to the bathroom, cough and hack some more, then go back to sleep.  I repeated this at least 6 times.

Needless to say I was not in the best of moods this morning when it was time to get up to go to school.  I still wasn't feeling good and totally would have stayed home if it weren't the last day of school with the prospect of not returning next year.  I wanted one last day with the kids.

To add on top of feeling miserable, my back decided to join the game this morning.  Amidst running late and trying to make parfaits for my News Team (as a farewell "thank you") my back decided to seize up.  I got a sudden sharp pain on the right side and simply could not move.  It eased up a little, so I continued my running around only to have it seize up again.  I was limping around trying to get myself out the door on time wondering why it decided to start doing this now.  I've complained about the occasional back pain, but this was like nothing I've felt before.  I think it probably has more to do with coughing and sleeping uncomfortably last night than with pregnancy, but it definitely didn't make my morning easy.

Because of all my running around I managed to more or less skip breakfast (not something I do these days!).  I got a few bites here and there and intended to eat with the News Team kids, but it just didn't happen.  I always get "emotional" when I'm hungry.... but that mixed with little sleep, uncertainty about next year, and of course pregnancy hormones made for a very explosive situation.  I cried in front of the entire first grade when the music teacher told me I should go home because I didn't look well.  I cried to the principal for half an hour as I tried to get questions answered about the upcoming school year.  I cried to teachers walking down the hallway who offered to help pack up my room.  I would never try to claim I'm not an emotional person, but I have honestly only cried at school twice in my three years there.... to people's knowledge at least.  On top of that I've been really happy throughout this pregnancy, seeming to have avoided the raging hormonal mess I expected to suffer.

Coming home and taking a nap helped me feel a little better, but I think the hunger monster struck again without me realizing.  I was in the middle of making dinner and grabbed a pot off the stove that needed to be cleaned.  The handle had been resting up against another pot that was boiling water... I knew it would be hot so I used a glove.  I set the pot on the counter, walked away, did a few things, came back to the pot and grabbed the handle full on (having forgotten by now that it was hot) and burnt three of my fingers.  I immediately went into hysterics, crying like a toddler having a temper-tantrum!  Jason had to finish cooking dinner...

Sigh... what a day.  I'm hoping the sleepless night, the back pain and the hormonal roller coaster of today will be just that... simply the events of one "bad day".  These typical pregnancy complaints really only came about by being fueled by other factors, but I still thought to myself, "wow, this is how it feels to be 8 1/2 months pregnant! No wonder people complain so much!".

I'm believing that once this cold is over though I shall hopefully return to my happy, relatively comfortable, pregnant-self!



Added later: Wow... not even joking.... no less than 2 minutes after publishing this post I went to the bathroom to get ready for bed and discovered....a tick! On my back! How did that get there!?  We all know how much I love bugs... (I'm paralyzingly afraid of them in fact).  So.... that led to another break down as I freaked out while Jason tried to get it off, which led to uncontrollable coughing thanks to this cold, which led to me throwing up.  Woo hoo!  What a day!  I really should have titled this post "My Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day".  Has anyone read that book?  Maybe I should add it to my list of books for Floodling...

Patience and Trust, part 2

In an early post I talked about how I had developed a mantra, "patience and trust" that helped me get through the first few weeks of uncertainty with this pregnancy.  I talked about how I had to resort to simply letting go and trusting God's plan as I waited various test results and time between doctor's appointments.  Patience does not come easy to me, and trusting God was something somewhat new to me as well.  But repeating this to myself got me through, and I am happily here only 5 weeks away from meeting my son!

In my birthing class we were told to pick one or two mantras (from a list) to help us get through our birth- affirmations that would help keep us positive and focused.  I liked a few from the list but ultimately decided on "patience and trust" because I know it worked for me before.  I know I will have to let go of my time schedule... I know will exhaust myself and ultimately put myself in a place where I'm unable to continue if I'm counting down hours of labor and exactly how long each contraction is, and how long I stay in each phase, and how long it takes to dilate... I also know I'm going to have to trust that my body knows what to do and is capable of bringing baby into the world safely.  And again, I will have to trust God's plan.

It seems before I even get to that point though I am turning to this mantra yet again, though in a completely different realm.... I got news from my principal today that I am to be "reassigned".  That means I will likely be at a different school next year, though I don't yet know exactly where (or what even) I'll be teaching.  My principal had no information regarding where I'll be going, or even when I will know (that's where patience comes in!).

I love my school.  From the very beginning I felt like I was part of a family.  The teachers are so positive and caring for not only their students but each other as well.  I never knew adults could work so well together!  After my student teaching experience and my first year teaching at a high school, I didn't know that teaching could make me so happy!

Even more than that I love my team.  I work very closely with the PE teacher and the music teacher.  They have been great mentors to me as I've grown in my teaching career.   They've taught me how to be compassionate and how to use my class as a tool to nurture and grow students.  They have always been supportive of me, and especially right now they've gone out of their way to make sure I make it through the end of this year with as little stress as possible.

And as much as I complain about the little rascals, I love my students.  I teach a very diverse population, but that's what I love!  I love being forced to re-think myself and to having to understand where they are coming from.  I know they have taught me as much, if not more, than I have taught them.

As I think about being reassigned my biggest worry is that my reassignment will put me back in a high school.  I am certified to teach K-12, but I truly don't want to go back to that.  It was one of the most miserable time periods of my life.   I'm even nervous about possibly being put in a middle school.

On top of that I simply don't feel mentally prepared to go through the work involved with a reassignment.  Having to pack up my classroom is a task I don't want to undertake right now (I can hardly move the stuff around enough to simply store it in my closets right now!).  And I am not excited about having to set up in yet another classroom next year.  Nor am I happy about having to readjust yet again to a new principal (we had a new principal this year at our school), or having to learn to fit in with a new staff, or having to design my curriculum yet again.  I tend to be bad about approaching the new school year with dread, even where I'm happy.  I already knew next year would be tougher than normal returning to work since I know I'm not going to want to leave baby.  I fear I will have a horribly hard time doing it now with the extra work that I have to face.

But I am (actually WE are- my fellow teachers are included in this) giving it up to God.  They believe He will keep me at my school, but that if not, that His plan is greater than that. I know my principal has advocated to keep me- she wrote to the county justifying why I am needed at the school.  She even offered up two paraprofessional positions in order to try and keep me.  She told me her biggest hope right now is that they can't find anywhere else to put me so I get to stay.  But if I don't get to stay, maybe it's for the best.  Maybe I'll be closer to home so I can spend more time with baby.  Maybe I will have a great team at the new school too....

So all I can do right now is be patient as I await more news, and trust that God won't give me more than I can handle.  When I start to worry about what next year will bring I just keep telling myself "patience and trust".

I hate Tuesdays!

No, that's not a typo.  I didn't mean to say "I hate Mondays" like most people... I truly mean it.  I hate Tuesdays!  Probably on the same level that most people hate Mondays.  In fact, I would have a whole week of Mondays if it meant I could skip Tuesday.

You've got it all wrong Garfield!

What makes Tuesdays so bad?  It is the only day of the week that I have to teach all 6 grade levels (K-5)... with no planning period, and no time between classes (ok, I lie... I have 5 minutes between classes, but even if I actually manage to get my class out on time the next one is usually already waiting for me anyway).  I have to admit that the PE teacher does this every day and I truly feel for her!  And I also have to admit that this was more-or-less my schedule last year BUT with the major exceptions that 1) I had a planning period (albeit a short one) and 2) the class periods were shorter (I taught from 8:15 to 1:55 instead of the current 7:50 to 2:00). To top it all off I have to do the news broadcast in the AM (which takes from 7:00 to 7:50, meaning I'm running from the library to catch my first class) then I have bus duty in the PM from 2:15 to 3:00.....all I can say is thank goodness I at least have 45 minutes for lunch!

Overall what makes Tuesdays so horrible is not having a single moment of free time.  That doesn't work so well for a gal that's preggo!  No time to go to the bathroom, no time to eat a snack (which I regularly need around 10:00), and no time to even sit for a moment!  I can't help but feel bad for my Tuesday classes.... they get the worst side of "Señora Flood"!

Kids Say the Darndest Things

Being a teacher and therefore being around kids during much of my days I get to hear all sorts of comments regarding my new "rounder" look.  I thought it would be fun to compile them, even though right now I can only remember four specific comments (there have been many more, I just can't remember exactly).  I figured as I get more I can add to my list.

Kindergartner:
Student: What's that hanging out of your tummy?
Me: You mean this? My ID badge? [Since it hangs around my neck and rests on my stomach]
Student: No! That! [pokes my belly]

Second grader:
Student: Is that a baby? [sounding disbelieving and pointing at my stomach]
Me: Yes...
Student: Ohhhh.... I thought it was a basketball!!
(I don't think he was kidding... second graders make it pretty obvious when they think they're being funny, he seemed to genuinely think I was hiding a basketball)

Kindergartener:
Student: What's wrong with your tummy!? [true concern in his voice]
Me: (Stupid response) There's a baby in there!
Student: What!? Why do you have a baby in your tummy!?
(How do you respond to that!?)

Four-year old:
Child: [In response to hearing his mom say I'm having a boy] You're a boy??
Me: No, but I'm having a baby boy, like you!
Child: Where's the baby?
Me: Right here... [pointing to my tummy]
Child: That's why your tummy is fat!!

I'm late! (No, not that kind of late... well, actually....)

I am actually a day late posting!  Sorry if you've been waiting on me. I've posted my Saturday posts late in the day before but never a whole day late... there is a first time for everything though and I have a feeling that once Floodling arrives I will have a whole new meaning to the word "late"!

I was actually out of town without a computer on Friday and Saturday.  I attended a FLAG conference (Foreign Langauge Association of Georgia).  It was actually very fun and informative!  I have a TON of new stuff to bring back to my classroom, and not just ideas!  I did a "make and take" seminar on Friday morning and actually made some games and things to use.  This was one of the first conferences I've been to where I didn't feel like it was a complete waste of time.  I usually sit in the seminars falling asleep because they're boring or it's something I already know.  Especially now that I teach elementary school I have a hard time finding sessions that apply to me (I don't teach grammar, I can't really use computers or internet.. and overall my kids are just not teenagers!). Elementary school language teachers are few and far between so most conferences are geared towards middle and high school.  But there were a TON of seminars for elementary teachers this time.  And every one of them had us either up and moving, or singing, or coloring, or doing something fun!  Besides the awkwardness of having to share a hotel room with a complete stranger I had a really good time.

I left the conference a bit early on Saturday so I could get home and actually visit with my mom!  That was a nice surprise.  My dad was driving down to Birmingham, Alabama for a motorcycle track weekend and my mom decided to go with him and just drive out to Atlanta to visit me.  She got here yesterday afternoon and we just sat and talked the afternoon away, went to Longhorn's for dinner (yay steak!) and chatted some more.  She stayed the night and left this morning... thus the reason my blog post is late.  It was so nice to see her, even if it was just for an evening.  And she got to feel Floodling wiggle for the first time!  Actually she felt lots of wiggles!

Speaking of... Floodling is obviously getting bigger these days!  I can feel him more and more and his movements are getting a LOT stronger.  I can actually feel him "shifting" now.... not just the little kicks and pokes, but I can feel my whole belly kind of shift as it feels like he slides around inside.  It's still not painful, but I can only imagine if he's moving this much now what it's going to be like later on and he has even less space!

In fact, Floodling definitely is bigger these days.  I had my monthly high risk OB appointment on Thursday.  He's a whopping 2 lbs. 6 oz. or so now!  He's still "above" the curve (somewhere in the 60th or 70th percentile... I don't remember exactly).  Turns out last time when he was "right on target" it was because they had my due date in the computer off by a whole week!  They had it as 6-11-10 instead of 6-17-10... someone read the 7 of my actual due date as a 1.  While it's not a huge deal (I know it's highly unlikely he'll actually be on time) it does make a difference when it comes to measurements, and that's the whole purpose of these appointments!  I actually caught it because I noticed that my last ultrasound pics said 22 wks 6 days but it should have been 22 wks 0 days, so I asked about it and the tech went to check on it.  She came back and asked where I got the date 6-17-10 and I said "my OB/GYN" so she left again and came back and was like "oops...".  Kind of scary!  The doctor apologized several times... I know they don't like to be caught in mistakes like that.

Floodling is about the length of an English cucumber at 26 weeks, but instead of a fruit/vegetable picture, or a drawing of a baby inside the womb, how about a picture of what he actually looks like?

Isn't that a cool picture??  That's the front view, by the way.  Can you see it?  It took me a second, but once you see it it's really cool! (Kind of like a "Magic Eye" picture)  I think it's much better than this front view at 18 weeks...

You can really see the shape of his chin though in both the pics!  So cute!!  My friend Stacey says it's my chin... I wonder if he'll have a dimple in his chin like Mommy too!  I think that's much cuter on boys than girls...  (And he is definitely still a boy.... once again he was flaunting it, the tech laughed.... I'm a little worried!)

The network of nerves in your baby's ears is better developed and more sensitive than before. He may now be able to hear both your voice and your partner's as you chat with each other. He's inhaling and exhaling small amounts of amniotic fluid, which is essential for the development of his lungs. These so-called breathing movements are also good practice for when he's born and takes that first gulp of air. And he's continuing to put on baby fat. He now weighs about a pound and two-thirds and measures 14 inches (an English hothouse cucumber) from head to heel. If you're having a boy, his testicles are beginning to descend into his scrotum — a trip that will take about two to three days.

P.S  I uploaded 2 other ultrasound pics on my "Ultrasound Photos" page (in the right-hand bar or you can click here).
P.P.S Don't forget to vote on my poll also in the right-hand bar!  Do you think Floodling will arrive early, late, or right on time??

Feeling good!

Posting a little late today, sorry!  I decided to get up and get going this morning rather than laying in bed as I usually do, but it's during my lazy laying in bed time that I usually post my Saturday weekly updates.

It's been a long week since our Tahoe trip brought us back home at nearly midnight on Monday night, putting me to bed around 1 before getting up at 5am (yes, I get up at 5... I have to be at school by 7:15, it's a 40 minute drive to get there, and I have to do meds, etc. before leaving).  Starting off a week that way generally leads to a very long week.  And it certainly did!

So, I am thankful to have a restful weekend this weekend.  I say I got "up and going" this morning, but I neglected to mention that I didn't wake up until 9 and would have slept even longer if it hadn't been for the lovely Charlie Horse I got in my calf.... ugh... hoping that's not going to become a frequent thing as I've had a couple in the last week or so and I keep reading that at this point they become fairly common in pregnancy.  I think it was from not drinking enough water (for me it tends to be from dehydration).  I slept so solidly last night that I didn't wake up once.  I usually wake up thirsty as a camel several times throughout the night, but I didn't wake up at all so I didn't drink a drop!  Thankfully that means I didn't wake up to go to the bathroom, but it apparently also left me somewhat dehydrated.

Even with being as tired as I've been this week, I'm thankful to say I have been feeling a lot better overall.  The achiness in my sides and belly has seemed to go away.  My back has been hurting, but not as frequently as it had been.  I'm really thankful for this as I had been starting to wonder why people say the second trimester is the most comfortable.  I kept thinking "if this is the best it gets, how bad is it going to be later!?".  Hoping the last month of the second trimester will continue this way... :)

I had fun shopping today with my gal pals in Athens.  My friend Lisa is getting married in September.  She's very busy finishing up in vet school so she's trying to pace herself in wedding planning and is trying to get things done as she can.  She ordered her dress a few months ago and it arrived this week, so she went for a fitting and for Sarah and I to try bridesmaids dresses.  Obviously I couldn't really try anything on right now, which makes me sad!  I love trying on dresses!  I will also have to order the dress by May, which means it will be a guessing game as far as sizing.  I'm hoping I will have dropped my weight by September (that gives me about 3 months), but I guess we'll see! They recommended buying a size larger than I normally wear (pre-pregnancy) that way it can be altered smaller if necessary but I won't screw myself over by having a dress that doesn't fit at all if I don't loose the weight.

For whatever reason, the site that I get my weekly development blurbs from (babycenter.com) says that at 23 weeks our baby is the size of a large mango, but the picture for 23 weeks from the same site is a corn cob... strange.  I was using two different sites before for my pic and development update as I liked the pics from another site better (thebump.com) because I liked how it showed the week number, and approximate weight and length, but that site only had a brief development blurb.  Anyways.... since I can no longer use the weekly photos from thebump.com as there are no weekly photos anymore, this is what I've got! :)

Turn on the radio and sway to the music. With his sense of movement well developed by now, your baby can feel you dance. And now that he's more than 11 inches long and weighs just over a pound (about as much as a large mango), you may be able to see him squirm underneath your clothes. Blood vessels in his lungs are developing to prepare for breathing, and the sounds that your baby's increasingly keen ears pick up are preparing him for entry into the outside world. Loud noises that become familiar now — such as your dog barking or the roar of the vacuum cleaner — probably won't faze him when he hears them outside the womb.

I've been saying it for a while now, I'm glad that the baby gets used to sounds now.  I was scared for a while that my frequent coughing would constantly wake him up or scare him.  I'm glad to know that he should be used to it by the time he gets here!  Maybe he'll also be used to our loud cats! They are worse than our dog!

Another quiet week

I usually do try to update more than once a week, but I guess this was another quiet week with not much to say.  Jason was out of town on business and I don't like being alone... I tend to hole myself up and do nothing, so I guess that's my excuse. :P

Nothing exciting has been going on this week. School has been rough... I am wondering how I am going to keep up the energy!  On top of that I am finding it hard to get in the right attitude.  A lot of the kids I teach are going through a lot of stuff at home, and I try to understand that when dealing with them, but this week I've just felt like yelling and screaming at them.  And it's not even been behavior related... I've been getting so frustrated with.... well... their stupidity!!  I know... I know... their kids, but they just don't think before they speak!  I guess it's hormones getting in the way, because I am usually more patient than this, but seriously.... when I ask what day of the week it is, and we agree it's "miercoles" then I ask what tomorrow is... why would you say "miercoles"!?  I know we're speaking in another language, but we do this EVERY week!!! Sigh....

I got two nice large bags of clothes upon Jason's return from his trip from his sister Andrea who just had a baby boy last summer.  It's been a ton of fun going through the cute clothes! (Thanks Andrea, btw).  Now I'm really starting to think about needing to get things ready.  I've sort of done some searches online for ideas.... but really haven't done anything.  I still have a good bit of time, but I'm starting to worry... but what else is new? ;)

I did have an interesting dream the other night.... speaking of worrying.... I dreamt that I gave birth to a Cabbage Patch doll!  How weird is that?  And to make it weirder, I was told in my dream (as I was packing the doll in the car seat to bring home from the hospital) that "it sometimes happens, but the real baby is still on the way".  What a weird dream!!  Wondering what it means...

So we're at 20 weeks now!!  That's half-way!!  It feels good and bad at the same time... half of me is happy thinking we're that much closer to meeting our little one! But half of me is thinking "I have all this to do all over again, and it's only going to get worse from here?"  The past 20 weeks have not seemed short, and I doubt it's going to feel any shorter as the school year gets closer to the end.  And I know that I've had it really easy... but I've already started having back pain and aches down the sides of my belly, I can only imagine it's going to get a lot worse!  It also makes me feel, as mentioned above, that I really need to start thinking about getting things ready!

At 20 weeks our Floodling is the size of a cantaloupe!! Next week will be the last week with a weekly size update!  After week 21 we only get a monthly fruit! How sad!

 

Your baby weighs about 10 1/2 ounces now. He's also around 6 1/2 inches long from head to bottom and about 10 inches from head to heel — the length of a banana. (For the first 20 weeks, when a baby's legs are curled up against his torso and hard to measure, measurements are taken from the top of his head to his bottom — the "crown to rump" measurement. After 20 weeks, he's measured from head to toe.)  And while your baby is definitely getting bigger, there's still plenty of growing room in there, which allows him to twist and turn (and allows you to feel his acrobatics!).

Baby gulps down several ounces of amniotic fluid every day, both for nutrition and to practice swallowing and digesting. And, these days, those taste buds actually work! Studies show that after birth, babies respond best to tastes they've already had via amniotic fluid. Meaning, think about what you'd like your future child to eat as you prepare your own lunch.

Not a fruit this week!!

So, Georgia finally got some snow yesterday and I got to have a day off!  Woo hoo! Yes, it wasn't even an inch of snow, but we know that #1) Georgians can't even drive in rain, and #2) there really is no equipment to make it safe to drive in snow (ie. no snow plows, no salting trucks, etc.)  So yes, even with under an inch of snow, we had the day off due to icy road conditions.

The day off was incredibly welcome after my busy and stressful week!  My News Team did a great job in their Wednesday morning debut!  However, cords got mixed up sometime between Wednesday afternoon and Thursday morning (who would touch those!?!?) and we could NOT get live feed in time for Thursday morning.  We had to run to the front office at the last minute to do announcements over the intercom... not a fun way to start out the morning (stressing and running around before 8:00 is not my choice of wake-up call).  Then I spent every spare minute I had the rest of the day Thursday playing with the cords until my fingers hurt from screwing and unscrewing cable wires!  I did manage to fix it though, ALL BY MYSELF!  Who knew I was so tech savvy??

So, with all that, the snow day was welcome... a day for me to chill out and again focus on taking care of myself!

Our baby is growing lots these days and is now the size of an onion!  I'm trying to figure out if I'm feeling movements now!  I think I keep feeling little flutterings and nudges, but I can't feel anything from the outside when I put a hand on my belly.  The sensations are so light it's easy to make myself think I just imagined it.... and on top of that it's not like things haven't been gurgly in that area these days... but I think by now I know what gas feels like as opposed to something else. I've read that people usually start feeling movement between weeks 14 and 22... but that first time moms are more likely not to feel anything until closer to week 20 (or at least not to recognize what they're feeling).  I've also read that "skinny minnie" moms tend to feel movements earlier than larger moms because the extra "padding" can kind of mute the sensations... and though I am by no means going to claim that I am fat, my pudge tends to accumulate on my tummy so I'd be kind of surprised to be feeling things so early.

Your baby's skeleton is changing from soft cartilage to bone, and the umbilical cord — her lifeline to the placenta — is growing stronger and thicker. Your baby weighs 5 ounces now (about as much as a turnip), and she's around 5 inches long from head to bottom. She can move her joints, her sweat glands are starting to develop, and those little fingers and toes are now topped by one-of-a-kind prints.

Don't forget to vote!! (Check out the right-hand column of the page!)

Busy busy busy!!

Warning:  This is a very long post!  But there is some exciting information at the end, so if you're patient and read, you will be rewarded!  Of course, you can skip all my blabber if you want... I won't be offended... but if you read it all I'll know you truly love me! ;)

So, if you are friends with me on Facebook, or otherwise talk to me regularly, you know that my return to school after the holiday was quite dreaded, and the first day back was a long one.  The first day back to school is always rough after any break.. and it gets progressively harder based on the length of the break, so Christmas break is always the worst!  You  never seem quite prepared for classes... you know the kids are going to act like it's the first day of school again, and of course the loss of the ability to sleep in is never welcome either.  This return from Christmas break was made that much harder as I was met with not only my fullest day of classes (I don't get any planning periods on Tuesdays), but also the obstacle of trying to get my News Team (as mentioned in an earlier post) up and running.

I was SO nervous about the morning announcements, I can't even explain it!  I spent all of Monday prepping things (backgrounds, cut-outs to show weather, temperature.... scenes for the moment of silence and the anthem) that I hardly got anything planned for my classes on Tuesday! I came home from school and worked until I went to bed!  Then Tuesday morning I was so nervous I couldn't even eat!  Thankfully we had decided to start on Wednesday, but Tuesday morning was our last chance to practice, and I was so nervous that the kids would have forgotten everything!!

The practice went so well that I was able to sleep easy last night knowing things would go fine today... and they did!  Minus a glitch involving a frozen exercise DVD (the school is supposed to do some brief exercises every morning) everything went fine, and hopefully it will only get better from here!

All this worry and running around has left hardly any time for me to worry or think about baby, which is good in some ways, and bad in others.  I have a tendency to over-worry about things (gee, really!?) so having something else to think about can be a good thing, but I don't really think it's better for me to get so busy and worried that I'm not taking care of myself.  I kept thinking all Tuesday how horrible I was for not eating breakfast!  Would I wake up and decide I was too busy to feed my child?  Of course not!  So why should it be any different for me right now not to feed myself?  I kept thinking I would get 5 minutes to eat something, but all my classes were bright and early, and I never even got so much as 30 seconds of free time before lunch!  I did manage to eat most of a banana (over the course of 50 minutes, while teaching!), but I still felt horrible!

But thanks to my wonderful husband, who has done so many things for me this week already, I am now able to put my feet up and take a few moments to breathe and refocus.

I do have exciting news though!  I finally got the call from my doctor telling me when my appointment is for the "anatomy screening".  This is the appointment where they do an ultrasound to make sure the baby is growing properly, but it's also the appointment where we get to find out if we're having a boy or a girl!  AND it's only one week away!  Well, one week and one day, but close enough!  I'm super excited!!

I am very curious as to what you all *think* we are going to have.  I think it would be fun to see what you think before making the actual announcement.  So, you will see on the right side of the blog there is now a "vote" feature where you can guess whether we'll have a boy or a girl.  And, besides my mom and sister, I sometimes think no one is reading the blog (no one leaves comments!), so this is a way that you can anonymously contribute to the blog and let me know that people are reading!

To help you in your decision, if you don't already know what you think, I will review some popular old wives' tales:
I am craving salty snacks instead of sweet (and yes, admittedly, pickles!). That means boy.
A ring dangled over my belly swings in a circle instead of back and forth, which means girl.
The Chinese Gender chart predicts a girl.
My face seems to be clearing up since the pregnancy (no more pimples!). That means boy.
I didn't really have morning sickness, which means boy.
Urine (lovely, I know) has been dark, not neon... that means girl.

Hmm.... I'm curious to see what you think!  You're welcome to make your vote and also to post your vote in a comment if you want me to know what you said! (You do not have to log in to leave a comment, you can choose to post anonymously then sign your name).

Also, as promised this week, new belly pic!  Week 16 means things should be starting to pop out, and I think they are!  I've had several teachers (who still apparently didn't know) brave enough to ask me this week.  They said they'd wondered for a while, but it is now getting obvious that I'm not just putting on weight.

6 weeks

8 weeks

12 weeks

16 weeks

It's really funny because each time I don't think the picture is going to show much change, but then I am surprised!  Floodling is doing lots of growing, and so am I!  I wonder how much longer I'll fit in this pink shirt!