Why I'm NOT ready

 At 38 weeks I know a lot of women are just "done" with pregnancy.  They're over the whole thing, tired of sharing their body and all the aches, pains, and side effects caused by it.

I, however, am apparently not at that point yet.  It could be partially due to my long "to-do" list which looks something like this:

1. PACK!
2. Install car seat!
3. Clean carpets
4. Get glider cleaned and moved
5. Make curtains
6. Hang wall art
7. Find a solution for bookshelves
8. Finish organizing nursery

I need more time!

I'm sure there's a "fear" element too.... fear of not being a good mom, not knowing what to do, not being able to handle things, not getting enough sleep, and overall life changing so drastically!  But I'm also super excited to meet this little guy and get to see who he looks like, what he'll be like, and who he'll grow up to be!

It could also be due to the fact that I'm simply not miserable.  What I'm about to write makes me nervous because I could be ruining everything, right here, right now, as I bring up all the things I have yet to suffer.  I could be "jinxing" myself to say these thing "out loud" (okay, in writing, but still...).  But here goes....

Overall I feel I've had a really good pregnancy.  Except for the pretty rocky beginning (see these posts: 1, 2, 3) I've skipped out on a lot of the typical complaints, as I've mentioned before.  I have been happy not to suffer from:

• Morning sickness- except for the one morning I actually threw up and an overall sense of "bleh" for a little while, I never really had a problem with morning sickness
• Itchiness- I don't know if it's been the stretch mark creams, or what, but I am thankful that my belly and skin haven't been driving me nuts!
• Moodiness- even ask Jason, he'd tell you overall I've probably been more level-headed than normal.  Until the last few weeks that is... I'm getting a little irritable and the stress of the unknown with my job is getting to me too... but still, I don't seem to have "whoa, watch out for the pregnant lady!" mood swings.
• Trouble sleeping- okay, this one is kind of surprising me.  I still only get up once, maybe twice, a night to go to the bathroom, then I go right back to sleep!  Sleeping is not as comfortable as it used to be, but it really doesn't take me long to fall asleep, nor do I wake up out of discomfort or from Floodling squirming around.  I used to be an incredibly light sleeper, but things have changed and now I sleep like a rock.  I swear this kid could kick me right between the ribs and I wouldn't even roll over.  Kind of makes me worry about when he arrives.... will I wake up when he cries!?
• Painful kicks- I've heard a lot of people complain about their little ones getting their hands or feet all tangled up in their ribs, or getting really painful kicks.  Every once in a while Floodling will do something that makes me go "oof" (especially if he hits my bladder) but it hasn't been bad at all!
• Swelling- unless I sit in a chair for too long I really haven't had any swelling!
• Food cravings/aversions- I've had a few things that I've had "hankerings" for- spicy pickles in the beginning, steak in the middle, and right now it seems to be s'mores, but I haven't sent Jason out in the middle of the night to grab me anything because I haven't needed anything "right now!!".  Nor is there anything that just completely turns me off.
• Weight gain- I've put on the appropriate amount of weight, not too much, not too little, so I feel good and mobile still! 
• Stretch marks- I know I still have 2 weeks to go, and he's going to grow a lot in those two weeks, so I really shouldn't say anything yet, but so far, so good!  My secret? Check here!
• Heat- I really haven't been overly hot at all. I think, though, that I've really just become more like a normal person.  I am usually always freezing cold and my husband and I would always argue over the house temperature.  I think he's fairly pleased that I am now happy to have the temperature set where he likes it!

Now I'm not going to say I haven't had my complaints....

• Back pain- if I move the wrong way, or sit in the wrong type of chair, my back gets so achey that the only thing I can do to make it go away is lay down.  I can't even do the stretches I love at the gym because they make my back hurt!  And spending more than an hour at a restaurant? No thanks!
• Bending- it's getting incredibly difficult these days, and so, of course, I seem to be dropping everything!  I can thankfully still tie my shoes, though that is a long and annoying process in and of itself!  I'm loving that it's summer break and I can wear flip flops all the time!
• Getting around- getting up off the couch, out of the car, out of bed.... everything takes a little extra effort these days and it's getting a little old.
• Exhaustion- trying to get my "to do" list finished seems impossible sometimes because I get half a task completed and am just too tired to keep going!
• Bras- This is probably THE one thing that is getting to me the most.... the pain I posted about earlier has still not gone away!  Even after giving the bra a break for a bit.... the doctor thinks Floodling must have a foot there or something and it's stretching the muscles or skin.  I don't know, but living with this stabbing/burning sensation constantly is one thing I am looking forward to getting rid of!
• Bathroom- for someone who used to go maybe 3 times a day, it's hard sometimes having to go 3 times in one hour!  But I do have to admit that's not the norm for me.  I think I went from peeing like a camel (hardly at all!) to peeing like an actual normal person.

But overall I don't have the feeling yet that I'm just ready for this to be over.  (Of course, nor do I feel like I want to do this forever!)

My grandmother said that her mom told her not to wish away the pregnancy because "they're easier to take care of on the inside than the outside!".  So for now I'm happy to go with the flow and not wish away my time. 

We'll see how I feel in another week or so........